If you are afraid to talk about money, you’ll probably always be broke. Becoming comfortable with money requires an understanding that money itself represents far more to each of us than just pieces of paper. Understanding your emotions as they relate to money is vital to taking control of it instead of money controlling you. As an entrepreneur, if you don’t learn what money really means, you will never be able to help yourself, let alone others change their financial status.

Wallace Wattleswrote: “[S]ociety is so organized that man must have money in order to become the possessor of things…” Whether you are a fan of Wattles or not, he is right, the days of trading a pound of butter for a bag of wheat are a little past us now. Randy Gage wrote recently that money is a measuring stick. “If you do something at an extraordinary, exemplary and world class level in the marketplace, the market will make you rich. Because that is the way prosperity works.”

The problem is not money, but how people use it and view it. Money is a symbol and a powerful one at that. Money is not just paper to most people. According to Richard Trachtman, Ph.D., the problem for most people is that money represents such a wide area of problems including anxiety, depression, paranoia, impotence, impulse spending, gambling, social isolation, suicide, and murder. Most people have been taught that it is a taboo to talk about money. There are even books such as Etiquette written in 1922 and its new 17th edition, Emily Post’s Etiquette, that tell us it is rude in most cases to talk to people about personal finances. In 1908 Freud even connected money with feces and connected it to anal eroticism… WHAT in the world? No wonder people are so afraid of money.

No question that money surrounds us. Money can be influential, tempting and seductive. It is a main motivation in our world today. It is a primary reason for divorce and the love of money is for many one of the strongest moving forces in life.

The philosopher, Jacob Needlemansays that money must become a tool for any modern man or woman seriously wishing to find meaning in their lives. “We must use money in order to study ourselves as we are and as we can become.” Money is just a tool and it is about time we studied how we feel about ourselves.

Randy Gage is right, money is a measuring stick (a tool) and most people subconsciously know that. That is why it scares the heck out of them. People feel that money proves they are worth little and accomplish almost nothing. Why do you think people run from the topic of money and are secretive, embarrassed and conflicted about the subject of money?

If money scares you to death, join the club. It is so hard to talk about, the majority of newly weds have yet to even discuss it in any depth before the big day. However, to be successful in business and especially in network marketing, it is time to comfort your fear and understand what money can become to you, instead of how you think it defines you today.

What do you think?

In network marketing we build romantic stories about the successful leaders. We imagine that they hit home runs every at bat, throw 90 yard touch down passes and sink hook shots from 50 feet out on a consistent basis. It reminds of the Mel Gibson Classic Braveheart, where a young soldier doubted Wallace’s identity because he looked too ordinary:

William Wallace: Sons of Scotland! I am William Wallace.

Young Soldier: William Wallace is seven feet tall!

William Wallace: Yes, I’ve heard. Kills men by the hundreds. And if HE were here, he’d consume the English with fireballs from his eyes, and bolts of lightning from his arse.

It borders the absurd how we describe the accomplishments of ordinary people (Network marketing icons are really just normal dudes like the rest of us). This improper characterization is bad for new people and discourages rather than keeping them going. Who in the world really ever built their business without getting the crud beat of them?  New people get discouraged if they think they have to live up to impossible feats of marketing. In reality network marketing legends become what they are because they do the little things well. In an Eric Worre video post, he accurately tells us the secret to retention in network marketing is really just small victories. He is right.

Jenkins Lloyd Jones summed life up pretty well when he said, “[The fact is] most putts don’t drop. Most beef is tough. Most children grow up to be just people. Most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration. Most jobs are more often dull than otherwise… Life is like an old?time rail journey delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed.”

The people who think they will build their businesses with 4,000 people at every meeting and sponsoring only superstars do not understand how real success is achieved in MLM. Only marketers who consistently and diligently achieve small successes will create extraordinary profits in network marketing or make a lasting difference in the lives of their downline.

If you want a group of successful people in your downline, teach them that you will not fill coliseums without filling out a ton of names lists with newbies, teaching them to get passionate about a great product and sharing it with others. Great accomplishments are rarely achieved by overcoming the impossible with a miraculous effort in a short period of time. Great success in network marketing comes from creating habits over time that allow you to build persistently and which allow you to consistently improve your performance.

Great marketing leaders such as Eric Worre, Dexter Yager and Doug Wead are often credited with making a giant impact on groups. These icons within network marketing became who they are because of their ability to do the small things every day. I would even go so far as to say that the icons in network marketing are who they are because of the thousands of people like you and me who are doing the small things each day in their downline. The ultimate downline does not consist of just an incredible leader, but a group of people dedicated to the same goal. May I be so bold as to say that our main goal should be to deliver small victories every day to our new people.

It is time to dispel the myth of the network marketing Hail Mary which is the false belief that we can skip the growth pains and create the foundation for our business instantly and painlessly.  Hail Mary’s almost never work in American football and it does not work in MLM either. True success comes from the small and simple things done continuously. When we do the basics of network marketing consistently it can lead to exhilarating moments when we fill an arena with people.

Great leaders in network marketing are just simple people. I have met so many of them and what makes them geniuses is the fact that they know they are not geniuses. Our industry will become respected and our incomes sustained when we realize that we too can create extraordinary results by consistently doing the ordinary.

“If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up people together to collect wood and don’t assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.”

– Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Low expectations yield low results. Very few network marketers have the guts to challenge their people, consequently their groups remain small and underachieve. Instead of setting high expectations they keep their downline protected from responsibility and challenge in the hope that the people will stay in and not be overwhelmed. Our goal as marketers should be to set the bar high for our people and us. We want leaders who work hard, not thousands of people dependant upon us forever.

I am often asked, “What should I expect from my downline?”  The answer to that is, “Depends.”  Many successful leaders achieved their level from pure guts, some build leaders.  The distributors that don’t build leaders are grinders, they would show a plan when ever and where ever.  They don’t mentor possible leaders because they think they are way too busy. They are the heart and soul of their group and the group’s success lives and dies with this distributor.  That distributor’s downline is built on a poor foundation and will likely crumble when that distributor wears out and has to take a break.

Most people that join your group will never do anything other than attend a few meetings and buy product.  Welcome them.  Love them. Encourage them.  However, there are also people that are hungry and want to succeed at high levels.  Those people should be pushed, held accountable and lovingly guided into success by expecting a lot from them.

These future leaders are not afraid to do whatever it takes ethically to succeed.  But many times their upline is trying to protect these future leaders from doing too much.  This is crazy, because top leaders get to where they are because of their attitude of doing more than what is expected.  Top leaders only create true stability when they truly replace themselves.  They will create generational income only when they ask the same from their leaders and future leaders that they ask of themselves.  If not, when they go away or die, so will their groups without their presence.  Longevity is created by creating leaders.  Leaders are made through accountability to themselves and their mentors.

One who is committed to a cause will not simply “go through the motions” in becoming a leader.  A committed distributor will not be satisfied with just making a visit to one of his downline so he can report to his mentor that his job is “completed” or “done.” A committed distributor would not be content to merely “give” a presentation but would want to teach with passion. The result, if your leaders have the guts to ask for it, will be making a real difference in the impressionable lives of the new distributors entrusted to his or her care.  It will create real leadership.

The training programs we make are done in a way that asks little from the 97% but much from those who say they want to be leaders.  Responsibility and accountability will show you who really deserves your time. Companies and top leaders need to create more leaders, and learn to identify and love the 97%, because you need them in your business too.  However, to ask little from your future leaders is a big mistake.  Leaders want to be accountable, leaders want to feel empowered, and to ask anything less is creating a house of cards that will crumble eventually.

Network Marketing is powerful, use it wisely. When you are busy telling stories to your prospects who want to hear them, you’ll be tempted to tell stories that just don’t hold up. Lies. Deceptions. In his book All Marketers are Liars, Seth Godin made the points above about marketers, but does the same hold true for network marketers?